You are not in as much trouble as you think. You know that East has two spades (obviously Q–9 or J–9 doubleton) and four hearts. If he has four clubs and three diamonds, or five clubs and two diamonds, you are home.
Play the ♣K, ♣A and ruff a club, and say both follow, meaning you are playing East for four clubs and three diamonds. Cash the ♠A, then the ♦K, ♦A, ruff a diamond and ruff your fourth club and East follows. Don’t look now, but you have already taken 11 tricks! And you still have the ♥Q for trick 12.
What happened to your spade loser and your heart loser? Nothing. You lost them both … on the same trick, trick 13.
If West shows out on the third club, meaning East started with a 2=4=2=5 pattern, ruff the club, cash the ♠A, cross to the ♦K, ruff your last club in dummy and now cash the ♦A and lead a diamond in the three-card end position. Your last three cards are a losing spade and the ♥Q 9. East has the ♥J 10 and a club. West is not involved.
If East discards, ruff with the 9. The ♥Q is your 12th trick and, once again, you lose a spade and a heart on the same (last) trick. If East ruffs the diamond, discard your losing spade, and take the last two tricks with the ♥Q 9.
Maybe invitational sequences are for peasants after all.
Thanks to Al Blinder of Torrance CA for this one.
